Doug Glant's observations

Doug Glant first wrote this in 2002

As we surf into the 21st century on the crest of a tsunami of information and misinformation, instantly communicated and received, one of our oldest, most cherished forms of communication, conversation, is being debased with impressive dispatch.

Not to suggest that we aren't talking as much—in fact, with the proliferation of cell phones, we are talking more than ever but saying far less.

    Robert Bork and Norman Podhoretz, two quite estimable conservatives, disagree as to whether we are “slouching toward Gomorrah.” Judge Bork thinks “yes,” Norman, “no.” I tend to agree with the good judge’s view, but that’s merely tangential to today’s subject. My lament has to do with a cultural casualty that has more than merely “slouched.” As we surf into the 21^st century on the crest of a tsunami of information and misinformation, instantly communicated and received, one of our oldest, most cherished forms of communication, conversation, is being debased with impressive dispatch.

   As with much that we complacently enjoy for years and years, with nary a moment’s reflection, there is a sense of panic, perhaps even exaggerated appreciation, as these pleasures disappear. For those of us who delight in civilized talk, even as kibitzers, it is deeply disturbing to realize that few of its surviving practitioners are under 60. Come on, name someone under 50, under 60, who can charm with style and wit as did Peter Ustinov or William F. Buckley Jr. did in their youth…or as did Henry Kissinger, for whom English is a second language? [That would be under 70 or 80 in 2023. Sigh.]

   Not to suggest that we aren’t talking as much—in fact, with the proliferation of cell phones, we are talking more than ever but saying far less. If the sheer volume of inanity that passes for standard discourse these days weren’t enough, we also feel the need to embellish our conversation with superfluities stolen from children and teens, such as “like,” “totally,” “awesome,” (sometimes used together, as “like, she was totally awesome.” We also have “you know,” “I mean,” “so he goes, then I go, then she goes,” (this often goes on like a verbal tennis rally from hell) and my own personal bugaboo, the ubiquitous and ungrammatical use of “hopefully”---which is an adverb and does not mean “one hopes” or “I hope.” In case you have been in Bhutan, here is another example: “So, she goes, ‘Like, hopefully we’ll be at the airport soon,’ and I’m like, ‘Didn’t we pass it, you know, like 10 minutes ago?’” It’s not just Valley Girls who are using these abominations. In the 1950s, we had juvenile argot too—remember “cool,” “you dig?”, “all shook up,” “square,” “I’m hip,” “daddio.” Our parents decidedly did not parrot us. They patronizingly patted our little heads and suggested we would “outgrow it.” And most of us did.

   Now, I know we are in the Age of the Clintons (aka the Age of the Baby Boomers), when any attempt to prolong adolescence is respectable, even the adoption of juvenile jargon…but can you imagine Harry Truman, Dwight Eisenhower, Judy Garland, Joe DiMaggio, Gary Cooper, Jack Benny, or JFK stooping so low? Or Ronald Reagan, Maggie Thatcher, or Jimmy Carter? And as for the “good English is racism” mob, Martin Luther King Jr., Nat King Cole, Ella Fitzgerald, Sidney Poitier, and even Malcolm X spoke in clear, vibrant, flawless English. Is there a current leader or pop star whom you can’t imagine butchering the language? Or one whose use of English is exalting? We are back to the nub of our subject. Before I name names, let me elaborate just a bit further. I bristle at the notion that I’m a snob but am not upset at being called a cultural elitist. I also genuflect in the direction of Dr. Samuel Johnson and the Oscars (Wilde and Levant), but I don’t insist we aim that high.

   I’d settle for a pop culture within my memory, when a decidedly lowbrow song, country no less, had the lyric, “Another love before my time made your heart sad and blue…” No, not Lord Byron, just Hank Williams Sr., who wrote and sang “Cold, Cold Heart” in 1951. Tony Bennett covered it, so its simple, coherent message was a hit with American “brows” from low to middle, even high. For the highest brows of that era, we still had, among many others, Irving Berlin, Frank Loesser, Rodgers and Hammerstein, Sammy Cahn, and Cole Porter, whose 1956 movie hit “You’re Sensational” (from High Society) included these words: “I’ve no proof when people say you’re more or less aloof…” “Aloof”? Yes, Marge, in the bland, repressive ‘50s.

   And how does what now passes for conversation on TV compare to earlier times? Fuggeddabouddit. Steve Allen, Jack Paar, David Susskind, Dick Cavett, Johnny Carson—they gloried in intelligent talk and exalted wit and picked guests accordingly. Have you watched late-night TV recently? [It is far worse now in 2023.] The hosts are barely literate, and where do they find the dunderheads with whom they attempt to communicate? So, who’s to blame? I believe it’s in large part technology, but the elites who enthusiastically dumbed-down American schools in the name of racial diversity during the dreadful 1960s deserve a lot of credit. Television and the quickening pace of all forms of communication [I wrote this in 2002, before iPhones and social media!] have done even more damage. That is why I am almost bereft of hope.

   At a time when money drives our every action, in a manner inconceivable even to capitalists such as Adam Smith, Ludwig von Mises, F.A. Hayek, Peter Drucker, and Milton Friedman, and when there is no premium for verbal elegance or style, these will continue to diminish. Hopefully, I’m wrong, but I, like, don’t think so.  Curmudgeonly yours, a Mercer Island resident since 16 August 1977, Douglas Glant