100 Things Waiters Should Never Do

An interesting list from a NYT list of things waiters shouldn't do:
3. Never refuse to seat three guests because a fourth has not yet arrived.
7. Do not announce your name. No jokes, no flirting, no cuteness.
8. Do not interrupt a conversation. For any reason. Especially not to recite specials. Wait for the right moment.
11. Do not hustle the lobsters. That is, do not say, “We only have two lobsters left.” Even if there are only two lobsters left.
15. Never say “I don’t know” to any question without following with, “I’ll find out.”
17. Do not take an empty plate from one guest while others are still eating the same course. Wait, wait, wait.
24. Never use the same glass for a second drink.
30. Never let the wine bottle touch the glass into which you are pouring. No one wants to drink the dust or dirt from the bottle.
32. Never touch a customer. No excuses. Do not do it. Do not brush them, move them, wipe them or dust them.
40. Never say, “Good choice,” implying that other choices are bad.
41. Saying, “No problem” is a problem. It has a tone of insincerity or sarcasm. “My pleasure” or “You’re welcome” will do.
42. Do not compliment a guest’s attire or hairdo or makeup. You are insulting someone else.
49. Never mention the tip, unless asked.
52. Know your menu inside and out. If you serve Balsam Farm candy-striped beets, know something about Balsam Farm and candy-striped beets.
56. Do not ignore a table because it is not your table. Stop, look, listen, lend a hand. (Whether tips are pooled or not.)
57. Bring the pepper mill with the appetizer. Do not make people wait or beg for a condiment.
60. Bring all the appetizers at the same time, or do not bring the appetizers. Same with entrees and desserts.
61. Do not stand behind someone who is ordering. Make eye contact. Thank him or her.
64. Specials, spoken and printed, should always have prices.
66. Do not return to the guest anything that falls on the floor — be it napkin, spoon, menu or soy sauce.
75. Do not ask if someone is finished when others are still eating that course.
78. Do not ask, “Are you still working on that?” Dining is not work — until questions like this are asked.
85. Never bring a check until someone asks for it. Then give it to the person who asked for it.
86. If a few people signal for the check, find a neutral place on the table to leave it.
87. Do not stop your excellent service after the check is presented or paid.
88. Do not ask if a guest needs change. Just bring the change.
91. If someone complains about the music, do something about it, without upsetting the ambiance. (The music is not for the staff — it’s for the customers.)
99. Do not show frustration. Your only mission is to serve. Be patient. It is not easy.


http://boss.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/10/29/one-hundred-things-restaurant-staffers-should-never-do-part-one/
http://boss.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/11/05/one-hundred-things-restaurant-staffers-should-never-do-part-2/?em